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I'm Not Judging You For Changing Your Name

By Ashley Lauren Samsa

August 27, 2012

I’ve been musing a bit about last names recently, probably because I’m gearing up for another school year where I will be referred to solely as my last name for the next nine months. I actually enjoy this. It allows me to code-switch between my home life, where I am referred to as Ashley, and my school life, where I am referred to as Miss, Ms. S, or just my last name with no prefix ...

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Posted in Life, Marriage, nfti-home, Wives | (0) Comments »

I Stay With My Husband For The Healthcare Benefits

By Lynn Beisner

August 27, 2012

Does staying in a marriage for your partner's healthcare benefits mean you're using your partner? Or are you giving up your soul just to stay healthy? My friend Laurie got married a couple of months ago. I did not send her a present or even a card. In fact, the only thing I gave her was a shoulder to cry on. After the ceremony, she ran into me on her way back to work. We found a quiet place to...

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Posted in Culture and Politics, Husbands, Lynn, Marriage, nfti-home, Politics, Wives, Womanhood | (0) Comments »

6 Ways To Get Real About Relationships

By Lyla Cicero

August 26, 2012

Relationships are hard, but they're hard for everyone, not just you. Therapist Lyla Cicero offers her advice on how to have realistic expectations of your partner and your partnership, and how to help others in the process. 1) Act How You Feel (Within Reason): We’ve all been around those couples bickering violently in public or making nasty passive aggressive jabs all the time. When we a...

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Posted in Husbands, Lyla, Marriage, nfti-home, Sex, Sex and Relationships, Wives | (0) Comments »

My Breakup Ritual

By Ashley Lauren Samsa

August 24, 2012

Ashley Lauren Samsa bought CDs to commemorate the end of a relationship with old boyfriends. She answers why she's kept those CDs all these years. When I was packing my things to move in with my husband, I came across an old shoebox underneath my bed at my mom’s house, where I had moved back after living on my own for two years in order to afford grad school. I pulled the shoebox out, du...

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Posted in Marriage, nfti-home, Pop Culture, Sex and Relationships | (0) Comments »

Your Spouse Does Not Exist To Make You Happy

By Eric Sentell

August 23, 2012

Marriage isn't just about making each other happy, it's about making each other better people. Eric Sentell discusses families of origin, engaging the "crazy cycle," and navigating conflict in a marriage. The real wonder is not how hard marriage proves to be after the honeymoon wears off, but rather that it is manageable at all. Two different constellations of backgrounds, beliefs, values, ass...

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Posted in Eric, Husbands, Marriage, nfti-home, Sex and Relationships, Wives | (0) Comments »

Why Do We Marry People Like Our Parents?

by Kate McGuinness

August 19, 2012

Kate McGuinness married four different men all of whom had the characteristics of her mother or father. Why do so many people repeat the same mistakes? Our early childhood plays a major role in our choice of romantic partners. Dr. Harville Hendrix theorizes that “We marry the emotional image of our caregivers—both positive and negative.” Sometimes, in an effort to resolve tr...

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Posted in Husbands, Kate, Marriage, nfti-home, Sex and Relationships, Wives | (0) Comments »

Why I Chose To Hyphenate My Name

By Balancing Jane

August 17, 2012

Choosing a last name ended up meaning more to me than I thought it would. Wrapped up in this question were a host of social issues I was used to examining from afar, through hypothetical theories and distant studies. Suddenly they were all here, in my face, and very personal. In some ways, choosing a name felt like a challenge to “walk the walk” and own up to some of the philosophie...

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Posted in Culture and Politics, Husbands, Marriage, nfti-home, Wives | (0) Comments »

Changing My Name Removes A Part Of My Identity

By Katelyn

August 07, 2012

Although I am not married, I have spent years thinking about whether I am going to keep my name when I do get married. For most of my life, aesthetic has been the primary deciding point for me; does the name flow off the tongue appropriately? I remember that when I was about 5 years old, I just knew that I was going to marry my best friend Joshua one day. I also remember deciding that—sin...

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Posted in Culture and Politics, Feminism, Husbands, Marriage, nfti-home, Wives | (0) Comments »

You Can Clean The House And Still Be A Feminist

By Ashley Lauren Samsa

August 02, 2012

Navigating her new role as a wife, feminist Ashley Lauren Samsa finally figured out that cleaning your house doesn't automatically make you June Cleaver. The personal is political. As a feminist, this has been my mantra for years, so when I decided to get married, I wanted my marriage to reflect what an equal partnership should look like. We would share all of the housework equally. We would a...

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Posted in Feminism, Gender Roles, Husbands, Life, Marriage, nfti-home, Wives | (0) Comments »

On Choosing A Last Name As A Married Lesbian Couple

By Cindy

August 01, 2012

I grew up in a family where all the women changed their names at marriage (for some this meant changing it multiple times). My mother changed her name when she married my father and changed it back when they divorced. In my early 20s, I dated someone who was very traditional, and who repeatedly commented about how his stepmother was not a true [insert his last name] because she had not changed ...

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Posted in Family, Feminism, LGBT, Marriage, nfti-home, Wives | (0) Comments »

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