This appears to be the next installement in an ever-growing debate between married women (who know why you’re still single) and single women, who would prefer not to be told why they’re not married.

The institution of marriage is in a more tenous place than ever, causing many to ask: who needs marriage, anyway? And why is there something wrong with me if I’m not married?

This rift feels to me like the perfect embodiment of a cultural tension that’s been been building for a decade.  It was only a few months ago that a Time/Pew Research Center survey found that 4 out of 10 people think marriage is now obselete.  Our whole definition of family is changing rapidly, and marriage is simply no longer a pre-requisite.  Some think this is a terrible thing.  I don’t.  But as part of the shift-generation living through this redefinition, its clear we’re having a lot of growing pains.

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: we really need to be careful not to pit single vs. married women against each other.  One state is not better than the other and if anything, this is the moment to respect each other’s personal choices and struggles (both as single ladies and within marriages).

And finally, let’s not forget the  men here, either.  They are experiencing this shift too – at the same time that their earning power is decreasing and cultural norms are changing, they are also questioning what they are supposed to bring to a marriage, should they even make that choice.

Read Walsh’s full piece here.

-Nicole