The softest touch can cause the greatest pain. This is something all women know. In 6th grade, a boy named Vince sat behind me in social studies. Most days, he would lean forward during the lesson and touch the back of my neck or rub my shoulders. I told him to stop. I slapped his […]
We shouldn’t be surprised when rape culture graduates from boys to men. In 2014, then Florida State Seminoles quarterback Jameis Winston, now the starting QB for the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, stood on a table in the middle of campus and yelled out: “Fuck her right in the pussy!” It was a popular stunt among men […]
This is about a culture that, imperceptibly, seeps its values into the minds and hearts of well-meaning parents until that culture’s most awful beliefs about women come flying out of the mouths of the ones who love us most. I’m writing this piece anonymously because my mother frequently Googles me—types my name into a search bar […]
Prejudices are learned, and this is how it starts. In June, my son completed the first-grade. And during the course of our summer together, I’m realizing that he learned much more than how to identify the different types of clouds and how to distinguish between different parts of speech. Sending my son off to school, […]
Of course he’s thanking her. He has to. It’s the only way to be a man. Drake says he feels great about Madonna’s surprise kiss. Of course he says that. He has to. “Don’t misinterpret my shock!” begs Drake on Instagram. “I got to make out with the queen Madonna and I feel [100] about […]
I am sensitive because I am blessed to have a mother who validated the continuum of my emotions—a mother who encouraged me to acknowledge my hurt. When I am not OK, I can ask for help. I am a sensitive black man. Being sensitive became a badge of honor after a conversation with a male friend. I […]
Enough with this sexist stereotype. The majority of my experiences with girls and women has been positive, even life affirming. In 1988, when I was in eighth grade, I contracted an eye infection and wasn’t able to wear my contact lenses. At the time, my eyeglass lenses were inches thick—just like the proverbial Coke bottles—and […]
Anyone who thinks that rape jokes do not increase tolerance for rape, create a hostile educational environment for women on campuses, and negatively impact their ability to move freely is deluding themselves. Trigger warning for rape. Last week, two lawsuits were filed against Phi Kappa Tau fraternity at Georgia Tech. The fraternity made national news in 2013 after […]
A new study reports that adolescent girls think sexual aggression is “normal stuff.” Samantha Eyler asks: What are we telling our kids to make them believe rape culture is normal? On Sunday, Melissa Harris-Perry hosted a roundtable on new findings about how young people conceive of and respond to sexual harassment. The study, from the journal Gender […]
