When we criticize only-child families, we fail to recognize parents as people with wants and needs outside of parenting. “You’re not a real family unless you have more than one child.” This was news to my mom, who had decided not long after my birth that I would be her first and last. My parents […]
Honestly, I just don’t want to make the sacrifices required. Making the decision to not have children is a controversial choice for many people. Family and friends tell stories of indescribable love and fulfillment that come with parenthood—convinced that anyone who voluntarily foregoes the experience is making a huge mistake. What bothers me most about […]
Is my only child some kind of personal statement or a selfish reflection of my desire for more free time? Hell no. It’s just…what happened. It’s life. My wife and I have one kid. I’m not sure if we’re going to have another one. There’s a very decent chance that my daughter will be an […]
My husband and I do not harbor sorrow because we parent an only child; we celebrate our complete family. “You just have one?” she asked. Her scrub top displayed a rainbow of colors, like a collage pieced together without a purpose. She rattled this question with an even tone, as I stumbled into the grey […]
If only I knew then what I feel now. In my clinical practice as a psychologist, I specialized in women’s reproductive and maternal mental health long before being pregnant for over a year. Getting pregnant with my son was easy. The subsequent months of his development were filled with surprising enjoyment, international travel, and wild […]
Every parent of an only child has a serious reason why that child won’t have siblings, whether that reason is biological, economical, or philosophical. Here is the story I want to tell you: I found a new primary care physician and went to her for symptoms—heart palpitations, anxiety, diminished sex drive, fatigue—and I asked if […]
I promised myself that if I wasn’t pregnant with a second child by the time I turned 40, I’d put my ovaries to bed. My 40th birthday was last month. And a deal’s a deal. On the occasion of my husband, Erik’s, 40th birthday, we sat on the deck of a restaurant that overlooked the glittering […]
