When someone is grieving, you need only say, “I’m sorry for your loss.” Don’t force a bereft person to parry your reactions, receive your advice, or sate your curiosity. Just sit quietly and listen. On my kitchen counter sits his cast-iron teapot. The delicate, stemless wineglasses he brought over take up space in the cabinet. […]
“Grief was like a seizure that shook me like a storm” – author Patricia Cornwell. When my mom began treatment for end-stage liver cancer, I knew the odds of her survival weren’t good. As she grew thinner and weaker, I employed a slightly twisted mind game to try to steel myself for the unthinkable. Okay, […]
So, the part I don’t understand: Why does it take a celebrity to draw attention to this most basic of human conditions? The rancor over Patton Oswalt’s engagement 15 months after his wife’s death drives home the point that only the grieving can decide how to grieve, or conversely, when to be done mourning. In the case of […]
So much of what I love today began with her. I still take long, hot baths and occasionally put ketchup on popcorn because that’s what she did, and I want to be just like her. There’s a cute pair of jeans in my closet that I refuse to give away because I paid $200 for […]
If it’s possible to envy others’ grief, then I envy those whose loved ones have left more concrete evidence of themselves: photos, videos, and especially words. It’s been 3.5 years since my father died from a heart attack at age 63, and as Father’s Day looms, I wonder what he’d think about what’s happening on […]
Grief is an illogical process. And a person going through grief about miscarriage or anything else absolutely has every right to feel whatever they feel, regardless of whether or not it makes sense to you. Last month, I wrote about what I’ve learned from having three miscarriages in six months. Most of the comments were […]
I understood that I was, emotionally speaking, standing naked in front of the Internet, and that plenty of people wished I’d cover up. In Boston, the last of the leaves are turning brown and brittle, dappling the sidewalks of Jamaica Plain. My daughter, almost 2, crunches and kicks them with her sneakers on our way […]
