Monogamist or polyamorist, you need to put in the work if you want your relationships to thrive and be a positive force in your life. Love is something that demands work. I’ve been polyamorous for about a year. Although I don’t quite consider myself an “expert” in polyamory, I have been thinking about this past […]
Better relationships don’t have to come at the cost of so many, many bad ones. If we could actually teach good relationship skills… One night recently, I was playing Pokémon at a nearby Pokéstop-heavy area. I ended up hanging out with a bunch of 25-year-old-ish guys (and one lady) who were all a little drunk. […]
As someone who has suffered with a waxing and waning self-esteem, I’ve always had to be careful with myself. A coffee date with an ex could easily open up a healed wound, not necessarily because of their “stuff,” but because of mine. The Law of Attraction states like attracts like—meaning we tend to attract what […]
I’m learning that real interdependence is the overflow of self-care. I love to love. For 33 years I had no idea what that really meant. I never had a high school boyfriend. I was 21 when I lost my virginity in a casual relationship. Then I dated a series of people who were basically un-reciprocating. […]
The more I learned about a partner, the more insecurities, imperfections, and idiosyncrasies that revealed themselves, the less interested I was in hanging around. Back in my grunge days, when wide-lapelled polyester shirts made a brief resurgence in popularity, I found myself routinely scouring the racks of the Salvation Army to secure what, at the time, was […]
Looking back, most of the messages I received about sex and my masculinity’s role in sex were quite horrifying. Some of the most important lessons I’ve learned in life came through sports. They taught me hard work, commitment, and teamwork. They also taught me some of my most foundational lessons about masculinity and sex. Not […]
