Nobody thinks their son is going to hurt someone. It’s about time the subject of rape comes out of the closet. We’ve been pussyfooting around the topic for far too long, and our sons and daughters deserve more from us. The topic of sex is messy. It makes us uncomfortable. For many parents, the topic of sex […]
Outside of the circumcision debate, I can’t remember the last piece I read that dealt with boys and body autonomy. Why is that? I’m sitting at the school pick up line and I watch as my 6-year-old lines up with his classmates. There is a girl on either side of him, each of them holding […]
We need to move away from the oppressive myth that rape and assault only happen in violent fits of rage, a narrative that reinforces the idea that “real” rape is uncomplicated and straightforward. Content warning: rape and sexual assault My friends and I are telling the types of stories that only come out with a combination […]
Unwanted sexual contact has become way too common in the gay community. On a Sunday afternoon in Washington, D.C., I decided to hang out with the crew at our usual gay club hangout. I was having a great time drinking and doing a little two step, when nature called. I left my friends and went to […]
Many of the objections to “Yes Means Yes” come down to a discomfort with one thing: shifting the onus from survivors of sexual assault, mainly women, to perpetrators, mainly men. Last month, California passed a new law requiring state schools to use a “yes means yes” standard during campus sexual assault adjudication processes. Other states are following suit. […]
The new California ‘Yes Means Yes’ law is certainly progress, but it’s not the complete answer. True story: It was very late, and my friend’s cologne and pheromones had started to swirl together into a delicious chemical man-smell, setting my head spinning. He was one of the most attractive men I knew, and I’d been noticing […]
