Despite having the freedom to concentrate on my job, even prioritize and relish it, my concentration diffuses all throughout the day. A part of me has been left at home. The end of December is a sweet, liminal time for most academics—the fall semester grades have been posted, the incessant flow of desperate student emails […]
In today’s middle-class American household, men have just as much to lose in policies that affect family life as women do. Recently, a member of my online mothers’ group posted that she had sent my husband, Jason, a friend request on Facebook. I smiled. Our group of 200—the number our brilliant, business-minded administrator cited as […]
Women are still fighting against gender discrimination, yet they’re using valuable energy and resources to also improve the lives of the people doing the discriminating. Right now there are at least three campaigns that were started by female-led, dare I say “feminist,” organizations to help men. Finally! Finally ladies have realized the error of their […]
My paycheck and the health insurance it includes is my biggest contribution to my family. Don’t marry another academic, people told us. The market is brutal on couples. But in our mid-20s, Jason and I were thinking in romantic, not pragmatic terms. We met in our graduate creative writing program, the faculty of which included […]
I am a stay-at-home dad and my wife is a physician, so gender roles in our home are usually fluid and negotiable—unlike in the “real world.” “Dad, why does that sign say ‘Men Working’? Isn’t that sexist?” My 13-year-old daughter and I are driving to the store, and there is road work ahead. “Yes,” I sigh. […]
The main question facing any equality-minded SAHM or SAHD is: How do you pay the bills without giving away your independence? And for many working-class parents, staying at home is not even an option. Can anything be done? Many of you probably recall the incident last October when Obama managed to (again) enrage the country’s […]
Studies show that men who request flexible work accommodations or family leave received lower raises and performance reviews, or risk being perceived to have negative traits often used to stigmatize women, like weakness and uncertainty. Dear current or aspiring equal-sharing dads: Last week should have been a great one for you guys—or at least those of […]
The best advice we got as new parents was to not put much stock in parenting advice. Five years ago, when Stevie and I found out we were going to be parents, the first good, usable piece of parenting advice we received was this: “Take all parenting advice with a grain of salt. Everyone thinks […]
This article was originally published by Time Ideas. Republished here with permission. Anyone who doesn’t think stay-at-home dads nurture has not seen a stay-at-home dad in action. I think that woman just called me a pedophile. Maybe I should explain. I was recently part of a panel of three dads answering audience questions on the Bethenny Show. […]
As gender roles have shifted and continue to shift, our expectations of fathers have shifted as well. But neither parent deserves to be held to impossible standards. Between the various parenting movements, the inflated “Mommy war” debates and the labels inspired by tigers and helicopters and, apparently, organic chicken, everyday moms can’t help but feel […]
