I think we do children and parents a disservice by assuming that if anyone stays home, it must be the person who gave birth. Sometimes people ask my partner and me how we decided which of us would give birth to our daughter. For some couples with two uteruses between them, that might be a […]
Dear Dana is a bi-weekly advice column for humans who engage in romantic relationships. Please send your dilemmas, issues, conundrums, assumptions, conflicts, anxieties, worriments, obstacles, complications, predicaments, queries, questions, and any other synonyms for “problems” to deardana@rolereboot.org. Dear Dana: When my wife and I found out we were pregnant last year, I was thrilled at the […]
Despite having the freedom to concentrate on my job, even prioritize and relish it, my concentration diffuses all throughout the day. A part of me has been left at home. The end of December is a sweet, liminal time for most academics—the fall semester grades have been posted, the incessant flow of desperate student emails […]
The question of whose life is more luxurious, who is more selfish, who is lazier, etc., is a genuine distraction from truly important issues that affect all families. Last month, Allison B. Carter posted a piece in the New York Times about her decision to be a stay-at-home mom. It’s not a “luxury,” she argued. […]
In a modern society, which places a premium on choice versus destiny, is it that far fetched to believe a man can choose to stay home and nurture his children? I love kids, so much so that when my wife and I decided to start a family, a combination of her making more money than […]
In today’s middle-class American household, men have just as much to lose in policies that affect family life as women do. Recently, a member of my online mothers’ group posted that she had sent my husband, Jason, a friend request on Facebook. I smiled. Our group of 200—the number our brilliant, business-minded administrator cited as […]
Removing parents from the pedestals of World’s Best does not diminish us; it recognizes that raising children is a societal responsibility, a collective effort. Here’s a scene: I’m at the New England Aquarium with my husband Jason, his mother, who is visiting us from Alabama, and our 17-month-old daughter, Benna, who has just pooped her […]
Women are still fighting against gender discrimination, yet they’re using valuable energy and resources to also improve the lives of the people doing the discriminating. Right now there are at least three campaigns that were started by female-led, dare I say “feminist,” organizations to help men. Finally! Finally ladies have realized the error of their […]
I am a stay-at-home dad and my wife is a physician, so gender roles in our home are usually fluid and negotiable—unlike in the “real world.” “Dad, why does that sign say ‘Men Working’? Isn’t that sexist?” My 13-year-old daughter and I are driving to the store, and there is road work ahead. “Yes,” I sigh. […]
The main question facing any equality-minded SAHM or SAHD is: How do you pay the bills without giving away your independence? And for many working-class parents, staying at home is not even an option. Can anything be done? Many of you probably recall the incident last October when Obama managed to (again) enrage the country’s […]
