If I could accept that none of my attractions cancel out the others, why do I still feel like I am not enough? As a girl who liked boys, I never thought when I was younger that I would be allowed to take up space in those communities meant for people who were wholly something […]
I wondered if it would go from just texting to physical. Damn, how I fantasized about that. Part of me that hoped it would, then a huge part of me that knew it shouldn’t. I am a married, overweight, 40-something woman who’s not where she thought she’d be at this point in her life. For starters, […]
Why do people in the 21st century have to work so much harder to find a spouse? Why can’t we just marry the guy or girl who lives down the street? In his book, Modern Romance, comedian Aziz Ansari describes texting a woman named Tanya and asking her for a date. A few minutes later, […]
But I didn’t change my last name either. My husband and I have been married for almost 18 months. I think that means we’re still newlyweds. I know we still have a lot to learn about married life. It’s not easy blending two big personalities together into one harmonious couple…but we make it work. Much […]
In today’s middle-class American household, men have just as much to lose in policies that affect family life as women do. Recently, a member of my online mothers’ group posted that she had sent my husband, Jason, a friend request on Facebook. I smiled. Our group of 200—the number our brilliant, business-minded administrator cited as […]
My earliest sex education didn’t even mention that sex felt good. I was reassured that it was all right to say no, but never offered a script for arriving at yes. Recently, I wrote an essay about dating older men when I was still in my teens. I was shocked, though I shouldn’t have been, […]
Sexuality is fluid—and not just for women. When a woman kisses another woman in a bar, no one immediately labels her as gay. It’s simply thought of as “hot.” But if a straight guy kisses another guy in any way that could possibly be described as sexual, he’s thought of as gay or bi, or in total denial of […]
I went through the motions, like they do in all romantic comedies, all the way down to the bottom of the wine glass. In many ways, it was more of a performance than something sincere. Maybe that’s all that “closure” really is—a performance. I have been pondering what “closure” really means for the last four […]
