I have no desire to date right now because I’m afraid I’ll be murdered. A few weeks ago, I found myself writing this: A woman murdered in my mother’s hometown. A woman murdered in my hometown. If I have children, women will be murdered. If I don’t have children, women will be murdered. I’m talking […]
Quenching the frustrations and unspoken desires left lingering at the end of my marriage breakdown hadn’t just given me a newfound love of sex again, it had put me back in touch with something greater. When I became newly single after disembarking from an emotionally taxing 10-year marital cruise, I had one thing, and one thing alone, on my […]
It’s hard out there for a right-wing snowflake looking for love. Pity the single Republican in D.C. Not only do many of them have to work for a man who starts trade (though hopefully not nuclear) wars because he didn’t get enough sleep, but as a few GOPers anonymously complained to the Washingtonian, they can’t […]
Excuse me, but when did dating get this crappy? Let’s be honest, dating has always been a little shitty. With all the uncertainty, the anxiety, the “who pays at the end of the date?” stuff, it’s enough to stress anyone out. But modern dating? Well, dating today makes me want to poke my eyes out […]
Ortega and Hergovich argue that while old networks for coupling have gently dissolved, online dating has led people to connect differently, and in doing so, they’ve become less likely to marry within racial categories. Today, with over 50 million people on Tinder alone, the internet has become love’s kingdom of knowledge. Once stigmatized as a vacuous meeting […]
His core values aren’t that different than mine, they just come from a different place—couldn’t the rest be a work in progress? Once you’ve been on Tinder for more than a week, you mostly stop getting excited about new matches. The odds of meeting in person or even having a worthwhile messaging exchange are low. […]
Dear Dana is a bi-weekly advice column for humans who engage in romantic relationships. Please send your dilemmas, issues, conundrums, assumptions, conflicts, anxieties, worriments, obstacles, complications, predicaments, queries, questions, and any other synonyms for “problems” to deardana@rolereboot.org. Dear Dana, I have been single for three years, and I’ve found myself in a pattern I need to […]
When men’s dating preferences were observed, the age of women they expressed interest in never (never!) deviated from the early 20s. In 2014, OKCupid founder Christian Rudder published Dataclysm, a comprehensive book of his statistics and analysis from the popular dating site. One chapter centers on what Rudder calls “the nexus of beauty, sex, and […]
I was convinced that by taking a leap so out of character — so spontaneous and unexpected — I had changed the very trajectory of my love life. I’ve never been a risk taker. Jumping out of airplanes and popping pills never seemed thrilling or fun. It just seemed senseless and scary. While this outlook […]
As I stand there staring, I realize my mouth is actually watering—I’m a split second away from literally drooling over this guy. I don’t usually Tinder much when I come to the Mexican city my mother is from. It’s a small, everyone-knows-everyone kind of place. So I’m intrigued when I match with a blue-eyed, sandy-haired, […]
I want to be adored and celebrated and for someone to look at me in a way that makes me feel as magical and brilliant as I know I am. But what shows up is more like Cheeto-fingers brushing the hair out of my face and asking nicely for a blowjob. People everywhere have toe […]
Online or off, landing someone can be hard. Landing a single someone who is cool with your kids can be even harder. Carving out an online dating profile is tricky. But kids—and deciding whether or not to mention them—further complicate that task. These days, dating has largely moved online. And among the masses of those […]
